Kobold King he/him Posted June 20, 2014 Report Share Posted June 20, 2014 So, I saw a poster online that said you should pick up the nearest book and turn to page 45. The poster says that the first complete sentence describes your life. (Exhibit A.) Cool, I thought foolishly. I should do that. It was just my luck that there was a children's animal book right behind me. Ahem, "Skunks' powerful and unpleasant smell is enough to make people stay away from them." Has anyone else ever done so? Has this trick ever thoroughly insulted you before? 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tien'sPetLurg she/her Posted June 20, 2014 Report Share Posted June 20, 2014 (edited) I've never done this. I will play.Oh maaaan... this isn't good at all. The closest book to me is Frankl, Viktor E. Man's Search for Meaning. <edited due to sadness> I may need a do-over. Edited June 20, 2014 by Tien'sPetLurg 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tien'sPetLurg she/her Posted June 20, 2014 Report Share Posted June 20, 2014 Take 2. Rowling, J.K. (1998) Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"Errol!" said Ron, taking the limp owl from Percy and extracting a letter from under it's wing.I'm not sure what that says about me, but I prefer it to the one above. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kasimir he/him Posted June 20, 2014 Report Share Posted June 20, 2014 Has anyone else ever done so? Has this trick ever thoroughly insulted you before? Yes. Nothing convinces people that your life is perfectly, perfectly awesome as compared to having to take a line from The Critique of Pure Reason, or more appropriately, Kritik der reinen Vernunft to describe your life. After that, I went into an existential (ha!) crisis for the period of two hours, which was solved by a drink, and then I promptly redid it only to get a line explaning this equation used in population biology. I've just decided to stop it 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ADIMORTIS he/him Posted June 21, 2014 Report Share Posted June 21, 2014 As a word of advice,never try it on Elantris paperback ....In it the line is If only I had been able to meet her, if just once.... 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terisen he/him Posted June 21, 2014 Report Share Posted June 21, 2014 Giving a go with Earth Awakens (part of Formic Wars prequels for Ender's Game). "Father could be anywhere." Yeah, don't think that really applies! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted June 21, 2014 Report Share Posted June 21, 2014 (edited) Oh, great. I never get good lines with these. Try 1: Wild Cards, edited by George R. R. Martin. "They slammed together, draped over the canister, their hands entangled on each other's suits and the fuse to the bomb." So….my life sounds really naughty, taken out of context? Edited June 21, 2014 by TwiLyghtSansSparkles 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Argent he/him Posted June 21, 2014 Report Share Posted June 21, 2014 Uh. Since I have about a hundred books roughly at the same distance from me, I'll go with the one I am currently reading (A Crown Imperiled): "In some cities like Salador, the inner walled city was the smallest quarter." So... uh. I don't know. I am small-minded? The core of my personality is well guarded? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabriele she/her Posted June 21, 2014 Report Share Posted June 21, 2014 I have a shelf full of Penguin Classics right above my computer table. Pretty much in the middle of that sits Sir Walter Scott's Kenilworth. Forster left the room, and the courtier, who remained behind, paced the parlour more than once in deep thought, his arms folded on his bosom until at length he gave vent to his meditations in broken words, which we have somewhat enlarged and connected, that the soliloquy may be intelligible to the reader. Next time I go for one of my Fantasy shelves. Not only are 19th century sentences a hassle to type, they don't apply to my life, either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delightful Posted June 21, 2014 Report Share Posted June 21, 2014 (edited) Hmm not TOTALLY preposterous: "This time, she wore a uniform: camouflage trousers and dark tunic." (Insignia) Apparently I'm a ninja! Edit: I just thought I'd take a quick look in my next nearest book: 'Still, three thousand boxings... That would be enough to tempt even the most logical thief " #mistbornarewaycoolerthanninjas Edit 2: Thats it. I'm definitely Mistborn because I just hit top 16 rank!!! Edited June 21, 2014 by Delightful 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BreathTaker he/him Posted June 21, 2014 Report Share Posted June 21, 2014 (edited) Lady Delightful.... did you just... hashtag? My colsest book was an NATA Aircraft Towing Guide. The A319 is designed with means for conventional tractor towing. Ok, then. This just had to be the one day I left AoL at home. Edited June 21, 2014 by BreathTaker 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kobold King he/him Posted June 22, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 The A319 is designed with means for conventional tractor towing. So you're matter-of-fact, straight-to-the-point, and reliable? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BreathTaker he/him Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 yeah let's go with that. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delightful Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 (edited) Lady Delightful.... did you just... hashtag? No. Yes? ......Maybe? Edited June 22, 2014 by Delightful 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChocolateRob he/him Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 Well the way I'm sitting currently the nearest 'book' to me is The Complete Calvin and Hobbes the first sentence is "I'm home from school" not very appropriate these days but the first two panels from a C&H sunday strip are always throwaways so I'll have to accept - "AAAAGH TIGER ATTACK!" OK so the nearest actual book is The Abhorsen Chronicles but the line - The snow was falling steadily, but it was only a light fall and the cover was patchy. - is pretty dull compared to the above. My kindle is closer than both of these books so if I use the 45th page of the currently open book I get - "I didn't want to have a care with it and I didn't want to be told I was a child." - from Naamah's Kiss. I think I'm happy enough to be told I'm being a child so I'll have to go with tiger attack. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashiok Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 Some paperback version of Dune is right next to me. Page 45 How many times must I tell the lad never to settle himself with his back to a door? So... I always have my back to a door? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tien'sPetLurg she/her Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 I thought I'd try it today. "There is simply no other disease that approaches this kind of prevalence." - Undoing Depression by Richard O'Connor PhDWell.... I suppose I could take that to be an insult. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edgedancer he/him Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 Lets see. I sit right in front of my bookshelf, the Brandon section to be specific so this ought to be awesome. *Measures out the exact distance of books and finds WoR to be the closest* Yes! Page 45 first proper sentence: "Jasnah took a deep breath." Okay.... It has Jasnah in it so I guess that is good.... although kinda not saying much unless I add a lot of interpretation. How about I try Argents methode and take the book I currently am reading *takes out "The Black Prism" by Brent Weeks* "Neither carried a lance." Storm it! Now I feel emasculated 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wyrmhero he/him Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 (edited) So I had a go at this, and the closest book to me currently has this as its first complete sentence on page 45: 'The Ga-Ga-Gauls!!!', translated from a Dutch edition of Asterix and Obelix's Birthday: The Golden Book that my sister got me when she visited Amsterdam last year. Before you say 'that's not a book!', it's classified as one on Wikipedia. While I've put it down for quite some time, the book I'm technically currently reading is The Gunslinger, first book of The Dark Tower series by Stephen King. Page 45, first complete sentence: 'Children won't obey their parents, and a plague will be visited upon the multitudes'. I'm not sure what that means, though I was certainly somewhat disagreeable towards my parents when I was a child. However, in the spirit of the opening question, the actual closest book to me currently is Words of Radiance, but someone's done that, and picking a Sanderson novel would be rather obvious considering where we are. So the next nearest book would be New Scientist's Do Polar Bears Get Lonely?, which is a great start to describing myself in a book. It just gets better though, The first complete sentence is 'A defect like this is the most likely explanation'. Thanks, New Scientist. Edited June 22, 2014 by Wyrmhero 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matrim Bloody Cauthon he/him Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 "A fade," mat breathed when the inkeeper had gone. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaggai Posted June 22, 2014 Report Share Posted June 22, 2014 "Little specks of mica glittered at him." Mort, by Terry Pratchett. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabriele she/her Posted June 23, 2014 Report Share Posted June 23, 2014 So I had a go at this, and the closest book to me currently has this as its first complete sentence on page 45: 'The Ga-Ga-Gauls!!!', translated from a Dutch edition of Asterix and Obelix's Birthday: The Golden Book that my sister got me when she visited Amsterdam last year. Sounds like those poor pirates are going to lose another ship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kasimir he/him Posted June 23, 2014 Report Share Posted June 23, 2014 Despite my past experiences, I've currently tried again with the closest book to me. (Technically, it's books as there are two stacks of books close to me at the moment.) With the one on the right: "However, if the ultimate form of Tea can be reduced to the bare simplicity of Rikyu's poem, we may wonder why so much fuss could be created out of something so apparently simple." (Tea Life, Tea Mind, Soshitsu Sen XV.) I'm not so sure about this one, but it's not Kant, it's not population biology and it's got tea in it, capitalised, even. That's good, right? And from the pile on the left: "Lesen Sie zuerst die Situationen (1-8) und dann die Anzeigen (a-i)." Ok. This one doesn't look promising. But then again, one hardly expects some wisdom pertaining to your life to be found in a stack of German textbooks :/ 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
traceria she/her Posted June 23, 2014 Report Share Posted June 23, 2014 "He didn't remember ever feeling the story didn't make sense." This comes from the story "My Heart is Either Broken" in the Dangerous Women collection edited by G.R.R. Martin and Gardner Dozois. If this can be relied upon, either something in my life doesn't add up/I'm harboring some shady secret or I'm just a generally confused/dense individual. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Observer Posted July 8, 2014 Report Share Posted July 8, 2014 Only a monstrumologist would identify death as the only true cure-all. -The Monstrumologist No, this does not describe me at all. 100% fiction. Totally has nothing to do with my life or my job or the fact I spend my spare time looking up how to dispose of corpses. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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