Emerald101 he/him Posted June 2, 2015 Report Share Posted June 2, 2015 (edited) the part in WoR when wit is driving the carriage. "You!" "Me!" Edited June 2, 2015 by Emerald101 14 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unhinged he/him Posted June 2, 2015 Report Share Posted June 2, 2015 Any scene with Wit qualifies. 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moogle Posted June 2, 2015 Report Share Posted June 2, 2015 Syl in WoR: [syl] nodded, alighting in the air and settling down, her legs crossed at the knees as if she were primly seating herself in an invisible chair. She continued to hover there, moving exactly in step with him. “Giving up all pretense of obeying natural laws again, I see,” he said. “Natural laws?” Syl said, finding the concept amusing. “Laws are of men, Kaladin. Nature doesn’t have them!” “If I toss something upward, it comes back down.” “Except when it doesn’t.” “It’s a law.” “No,” Syl said, looking upward. “It’s more like . . . more like an agreement among friends.” He looked at her, raising an eyebrow. “We have to be consistent,” she said, leaning in conspiratorially. “Or we’ll break your brains.” I found this hilarious because it's wonderfully unclear whether or not she's joking. The other two big ones are boots, and Wit's "You!" segment. 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emilylime she/her Posted June 2, 2015 Report Share Posted June 2, 2015 (edited) I agree with all of these oh man ;w; But also... LIFT. "I can't affect the Physical Realm except in minor ways," Wyndle said. "This means that you will need to use Investiture to--" Lift yawned. "Use Investiture to--" She yawned wider. Starvin' Voidbringers never could catch a hint. Wyndle sighed. "Spread the seeds on the frame." "Oh, the theory itself isn't ridiculous," Wyndle said, speaking out of a bit of vine near her, the various cords of green moving like lips. "Merely the idea that you considers yourself to be pure in heart." "I'm pure," Lift whispered, grunting as she climbed. "I'm a child and stuff. I'm so storming pure I practically belch rainbows." "I ain't," she said. "Twelve's an unlucky number." She held up her hands. I'm only this many." "...Ten?" Tigzikk asked. "Is that how many that is? Sure, then. Ten." She lowered her hands. "If I can't count it on my fingers, it's unlucky." And she'd been that many for three years now. So there. Edited June 2, 2015 by Lady Eowyn 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CHOUTAGOD he/him Posted June 2, 2015 Report Share Posted June 2, 2015 Lopen giving a rude signal with his missing arm. Priceless! 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDarkDesperado he/him Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 "We're down here, and we're making bad puns. Please save us from ourselves!" I rest my case. 15 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sasori he/him Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 (edited) Lopen: “You’re in my home now!” she said, and Lopen mouthed along with the words. “In a Herdazian woman’s home, nobody’s station means nothing beside her own. I’m not going to have them come and get you and find you not properly fed! I’ll not have people saying that, Your Brightship, no I won’t! Eat up. I’ve got soup cooking.” “Ha!” he shouted, leaping to his feet. “Ha! Hey, Chilinko, come back here. I need to stick you to the wall!” Shallan: “I am offend!” Shallan yelled. “You have offended Her Highness again!” “Very offend!” “You’d better apologize.” “No apologize!” Shallan declared. “Boots!” “You want to burn.” “I am a stick.” “Think how much fun it would be?” “I am a stick.” “Stormlight,” Shallan said. “You could have it! All that I’m holding.” A pause. Finally, “I am a stick.” “Sticks need Stormlight. For . . . things . . .” Shallan blinked away tears of fatigue. “I am—” “—a stick,” Shallan said..." She’d meant it lightheartedly, but his expression only darkened further. “You think I’m as dumb as that stick.” Stop insulting my stick. The words came to her mind There are others that I like, but do not want to monopolize Edited June 3, 2015 by Sasori 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Honor Spren she/her Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 (edited) Okay, does this count? One scene in particular stood out to me after I read the Alcatraz series. "You!" he said, pointing to the driver. "Me!" the King's Wit replied from where he sat holding the reigns. I find this unnaturally funny, because in Alcatraz they have a very similar scene that goes: I froze in the middle of the hallway. "Kaz!" I exclaimed. "Me!" he exclaimed back. "Idiots!" Bastille said, pointing at both of us. That's not good enough for you eh? Okay, here are a few Wit quotes that HAVE to make you laugh. If you don't you're soulless. ". . . Does the king know you're back?" "Nope! I'm trying to think of a properly dramatic way to inform him. Perhaps a hundred chasm fiends marching in unison, singing an ode to my magnificence." "That sounds . . . hard." "Yeah, the storming things have a real trouble tuning their tonic chords and maintaining just intonation." "I have no idea what you just said" "Yeah, the storming things have a real trouble tuning their tonic chords and maintaining just intonation." "That doesn't help Wit." "Wit--" "What your implying I HURT the poor fellow?" "Well, no," Adolin said. "Exactly. Besides I'm quite certain he's got the ropes undone by now." "Stormfather!" "No, I'm Wit. But I understand how easy a mistake that is to make." And last but not least: "Has no one does my son a service and assassinated you yet?" "No, no assassins yet." Wit said, amused. "I guess I've already got to much chull-sass of my own." Edited June 4, 2015 by The Honor Spren 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
apepi Posted June 7, 2015 Report Share Posted June 7, 2015 Shallan talking about riding 'horses' not understanding how she would get sore, and it turned out that she has only rid ponies in circles and not horses. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxal she/her Posted June 7, 2015 Report Share Posted June 7, 2015 Shallan talking about riding 'horses' not understanding how she would get sore, and it turned out that she has only rid ponies in circles and not horses. Loved that one, but not because I thought it was overly funny, but because it gave some highlight into Shallan. She hates being wrong. She was deeply annoyed at Adolin for being right. I am also starting to think it pushed her towards thinking of Kaladin, but this is an entirely different discussion. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adamir he/him Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 (edited) Literally everything, and I mean everything, to do with Syl. Here's a cropped example. Syl: You realize you almost killed me, right? Kaladin: Sorry. And... you are intelligent and articulate? Syl: Compliment, please? Kaladin: But I - Syl: Gave a simple statement of fact. Kaladin: Fine, you're wonderful in every conceivable way. Syl: Also a fact; but I'll let that slide if you give me a sufficiently sincere smile. Edited June 9, 2015 by Adamir 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elsecaller3414 she/her Posted June 13, 2015 Report Share Posted June 13, 2015 No, she soulcast the globet to blood in her room. She was trying to soulcast something, maybe rock or shalebark, when she was completely alone in the gardens if I remember right. Okay, I stand corrected. I knew she turned a goblet into blood, and I knew she was alone on both occasions, I guess it all just blurs together. Thanks! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post kroen Posted June 13, 2015 Popular Post Report Share Posted June 13, 2015 This, by far: [Jasnah] studied him [Wit]. Then the sword burst to mist, vaporizing. She lowered her arm. “I don’t have time for you. A storm is coming, a terrible storm. It will bring the Voidbringers to—” “Already here.” “Damnation. We need to find Urithiru and—” “Already found.” She hesitated. “The Knights—” “Refounded,” Wit said. “In part by your apprentice who, I might add, is exactly seventy-seven percent more agreeable than you are. I took a poll.” “You’re lying.” “Okay, so it was a rather informal poll. But the ugly lizard-crab-thing gave you really poor marks for—” 17 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
natc Posted June 14, 2015 Report Share Posted June 14, 2015 Literally everything, and I mean everything, to do with Syl. Here's a cropped example. Syl: You realize you almost killed me, right? Kaladin: Sorry. And... you are intelligent and articulate? Syl: Compliment, please? Kaladin: But I - Syl: Gave a simple statement of fact. Kaladin: Fine, you're wonderful in every conceivable way. Syl: Also a fact; but I'll let that slide if you give me a sufficiently sincere smile. It's funnier when it's actually a really delayed punchline. From right after the gag about nature not having laws, only agreements between friends to avoid melting brains. Syl: Come on, that was worth at least a chuckle. *Kaladin snorts* Syl: A snort is not a chuckle. I know this because I am intelligent and articulate. You should compliment me now. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lightsongthebold Posted June 15, 2015 Report Share Posted June 15, 2015 This scene with Adolin and Kaladin: Adolin: humble aren't we Kaladin : no Adolin:that was a joke bridgeboy Kaladin:my mistake. I was under the impression that jokes were supposed to be funny Adolin:only to people with a sense of humour 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shardcellist Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 Just one I found funny that remains unmentioned: "This is the tiresome part of the feast, where the conversation grows louder but no smarter, and the company drunken." "Many people consider that sort of thing enjoyable." "Many people, unfortunately, are idiots." Her father smiled. Is it terribly difficult for you?" he asked softly. "Living with the rest of us, suffering our average wits and simple thoughts? Is it lonely to be so singular in your brilliance, Jasnah?" 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
physicskid he/him Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 You have all forgotten Rock feeding Sadeas Chull dung. “Er, yes,” Rock said. “Actually, I put this thing in his bread too. And used it as a garnish on the pork steak. And made a chutney out of it for the buttered garams. Chull dung, it has many uses, I found.” Teft laughed, his voice echoing. He fell on his side, so amused that Kaladin was afraid he’d roll right into the chasm. “Horneater,” Teft finally said, “I owe you a drink.” Rock smiled. Kaladin shook his head to himself, amazed. It suddenly made sense. “What?” Rock said, apparently noticing his expression. “This is what we need,” Kaladin said. “This! It’s the thing I’ve been missing.” Rock hesitated. “Chull dung? This is the thing you need?” Teft burst into another round of laugher.” 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cayden Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 You have all forgotten Rock feeding Sadeas Chull dung. “Er, yes,” Rock said. “Actually, I put this thing in his bread too. And used it as a garnish on the pork steak. And made a chutney out of it for the buttered garams. Chull dung, it has many uses, I found.” Teft laughed, his voice echoing. He fell on his side, so amused that Kaladin was afraid he’d roll right into the chasm. “Horneater,” Teft finally said, “I owe you a drink.” Rock smiled. Kaladin shook his head to himself, amazed. It suddenly made sense. “What?” Rock said, apparently noticing his expression. “This is what we need,” Kaladin said. “This! It’s the thing I’ve been missing.” Rock hesitated. “Chull dung? This is the thing you need?” Teft burst into another round of laugher.” I was just about to mention this, personally I thought it was one of the funniest things i've ever read. it really starts the whole Bridge Four bonding process. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elsecaller3414 she/her Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 Just one I found funny that remains unmentioned: "This is the tiresome part of the feast, where the conversation grows louder but no smarter, and the company drunken." "Many people consider that sort of thing enjoyable." "Many people, unfortunately, are idiots." Her father smiled. Is it terribly difficult for you?" he asked softly. "Living with the rest of us, suffering our average wits and simple thoughts? Is it lonely to be so singular in your brilliance, Jasnah?" Unfortunately, this is the way I think about most people my age; it's like they don't really know how to think straight. I guess I am one of the more calculated people in my grade. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tetriona she/her Posted June 17, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 I know what you mean.... I quote Jasnah every time I go to parties.... 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Varyn he/him Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 Shallan's simple, sarcastic line: "'Ah, the outdoors,' Shallan said. 'I visited that mythical place once.'" It's not the funniest, but it just shows Shallan's witty nature. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Wax he/him Posted June 18, 2015 Report Share Posted June 18, 2015 (edited) I think Shallan had quite a few funny lines.... + Balat - Love is like a music symphony... Shallan - So, if you finish early, your audience is disappointed? + Vathah - "Be careful, girl. You wouldn't want to accidentally insult a man". Shallan - "The last thing I'd want to do is accidentally insult you, Vathah. To think that I couldn't manage it on purpose if I wanted"... There were a few more Vathah/Shallan conversations that were quite witty. + Wit conversing with the person who was transporting Taln (about the objective frame of reference). Edited June 18, 2015 by axcellence 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yurisses Posted June 18, 2015 Report Share Posted June 18, 2015 Speaking of dung. When Syl finds the knobweed for Bridge Four, and leads Rock to dung as a joke. “I led him to a patch of chull dung as a prank. He didn’t even yell at me! He just looked at it, as if trying to figure out some hidden meaning.” She grimaced. “That’s not normal.” 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ars13690 he/him Posted June 18, 2015 Report Share Posted June 18, 2015 i like when pattern insults the scholar near the end of WoR 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yurisses Posted June 18, 2015 Report Share Posted June 18, 2015 i like when pattern insults the scholar near the end of WoR I forgot what this was so I went looking for it. Inadara said. “You should not dismiss one of my theories so quickly. I still think it might be related to the Voidbringers.” “Know you nothing of Patterns, old human?” Pattern said, huffing. When had he picked up how to huff? “Voidbringers have no pattern. Besides, I have read of them in your lore. They speak of spindly arms like bone, and horrific faces. I should think, if you wish to find one, the mirror might be a location where you can begin your search.” 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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