Chaos he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 1 hour ago, Assassin in Burgundy said: I tried to get Siri, the virtual assistant on iPhones to call me the Lord Ruler. The conversation went as follows: Me: Siri, call me the Lord Ruler. Siri: I'm sorry, I didn't get that. Me: I WILL DRILL A HOLE THROUGH YOUR MECHANICAL BRAIN WITH A COIN YOU ARTIFICIAL SWINE. (Already playing the part of the Lord Ruler) Siri: I'm sorry, I didn't get that. Me: ... Almost makes me want to get an iPhone for that (almost). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Assassin in Burgundy he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 On a happier note, it agreed to call me the Lord Ruler. Still doesn't agree to worship me though. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mashadar Mistborn he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 1 minute ago, Assassin in Burgundy said: On a happier note, it agreed to call me the Lord Ruler. Still doesn't agree to worship me though. Small steps... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 12 minutes ago, Assassin in Burgundy said: On a happier note, it agreed to call me the Lord Ruler. Still doesn't agree to worship me though. "Come on, Siri. Just worship me a little bit?" "I'm sorry, I didn't get that." "Okay….Siri, can you swear?" "Yes, I can swear. What would you like me to say?" "Say 'Lord Ruler! I can't believe you'd do something so stupid!'" "I'm sorry, but even while blaspheming, I would acknowledge you as my god." 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunbird she/her Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 (edited) Posted some new memes to the "What Happened in Portland" reaction thread. Update as of almost 1am MDT: Whoa. Sudden plague of spam topics in the General Brandon Discussion. @Chaos, did you delete those just now? Edited October 17, 2016 by Sunbird Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mestiv he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 I have a day that's a mix of bad and good, so it doesn't fit in neither of day threads. I'll just share here then! Today I told my boss I'm leaving my job. Her reaction was more or less like: "Oh, crap!" (translation not accurate ) So now I feel kinda bad that I didn't warn her earlier (I'm leaving with 1st of December), so she'd have more time to find a replacement for me. But I didn't feel too comfortable with saying I'm gonna leave, when I didn't have any idea where I'll go... Now on one hand I'm a bit sad to cause problems to her, as she's a good person etc. On the other hand, I'm happy I'll have a job with much better salary (almost 50% increase) and perspectives. There is also a third side, where I'm just nervous about three month trial period I'll have in this new job I hope I'll do fine and not end up unemployed next year Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darkness Ascendant he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 Any of y'all remember that time when when the popular contributers was measured in how many posts you made. And Kobold was seriously active, and made a tonne of posts, but was only contested by Twi and all those bot accounts that spammed the Shard? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soyperson Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 8 hours ago, Assassin in Burgundy said: I tried to get Siri, the virtual assistant on iPhones to call me the Lord Ruler. The conversation went as follows: Me: Siri, call me the Lord Ruler. Siri: I'm sorry, I didn't get that. Me: I WILL DRILL A HOLE THROUGH YOUR MECHANICAL BRAIN WITH A COIN YOU ARTIFICIAL SWINE. (Already playing the part of the Lord Ruler) Siri: I'm sorry, I didn't get that. Me: ... If it's Siri, make it call you God King. Oh, @Dankness Ascendant, if that was still the way things were I'd be pretty high up. This website is mostly how I spend my free time, when I'm not with my friends or playing music. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darkness Ascendant he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 (edited) 20 minutes ago, bleeder said: Oh, @Dankness Ascendant, if that was still the way things were I'd be pretty high up. This website is mostly how I spend my free time, when I'm not with my friends or playing music. Yeah, I've noticed. I wish I had free time, heck, I'm doing my history assignment at the same time as writing this. Whenever I do finish everything, good ol' Dad thinks of something to make me do, mostly things that will benefit him. Not to mention the amount of homework, assignments and all the tests I need to study for *sigh*. I'm assuming all of your friends live in the local area, and that you've stayed in that area for most of your life, so you probs have people really close to you. I've been constantly moving around since childhood, literally 3 months after I was born, we moved from Pakistan to Zambia, then to Dubai for a bit, then came here to Australia finally. And then, we still have to move around NSW due to my storming mother's job. Whenever I've settled into a new school, find people who get genuinely fond off, BAM we move off and process repeats in some other part of NSW. I've been to...6 schools in my 10 years at school, and it appears that we will be moving again next year, although thankfully I will stay at the same school. And I can definitely tell your parents aren't "curry" (Indian, Pakistani etc etc) or like mine, so their not like my parents, who are incredibly paranoid, cynical, stingy, insensitive and they don't trust anyone that isn't "curry" as well. And they don't trust my friends because they don't know their parents, which somehow has to do with them being trustworthy. So I'm always holed up here at home, constantly doing forced labour, studying, getting yelled at, insulted. Then, last year, I found all of you guys, my friends on the 17th Shard. I know that it may sound a bit sad, but you guys have been, and I hope always will be, one of the constant things in my life. Storm family, who needs them when you have the Shard aye? I know you'll all be surprised, but I always have bad days, I know you'll be surprised as I almost never post in the Bad Day thread, I never rant about my storming family save for my 4 storming annoying sisters and, according to SE, I'm a special kind of awesome. heh. Whenever I have a bad day at school, which is most days thanks to a couple of pains in the nari, and that my storming family don't make things any less shitty. But whenever I jump on the Shard, all those Bad feeling evaporate, the Shard is my happy place, and my only concern with it is that y'all aren't active enough (for me) XD. And you all manage to make things that much brighter, and allow me the small mercy, known as false hope, that tomorrow will be a better day. Here's to the 17th Shard, a true family. Edited October 17, 2016 by Dankness Ascendant I just reread what I wrote. It went from an acknowledgement, to an, I guess accusation, to a rant, then a little sentimental piece to a toast. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soyperson Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 (edited) 1 minute ago, Dankness Ascendant said: Yeah, I've noticed. I wish I had free time, heck, I'm doing my history assignment at the same time as writing this. Whenever I do finish everything, good ol' Dad thinks of something to make me do, mostly things that will benefit him. Not to mention the amount of homework, assignments and all the tests I need to study for *sigh*. I'm assuming all of your friends live in the local area, and that you've stayed in that area for most of your life, so you probs have people really close to you. I've been constantly moving around since childhood, literally 3 months after I was born, we moved from Pakistan to Zambia, then to Dubai for a bit, then came here to Australia finally. And then, we still have to move around NSW due to my storming mother's job. Whenever I've settled into a new school, find people who get genuinely fond off, BAM we move off and process repeats in some other part of NSW. I've been to...6 schools in my 10 years at school, and it appears that we will be moving again next year, although thankfully I will stay at the same school. And I can definitely tell your parents aren't "curry" (Indian, Pakistani etc etc) or like mine, so their not like my parents, who are incredibly paranoid, cynical, stingy, insensitive and they don't trust anyone that isn't "curry" as well. And they don't trust my friends because they don't know their parents, which somehow has to do with them being trustworthy. So I'm always holed up here at home, constantly doing forced labour, studying, getting yelled at, insulted. Then, last year, I found all of you guys, my friends on the 17th Shard. I know that it may sound a bit sad, but you guys have been, and I hope always will be, one of the constant things in my life. Storm family, who needs them when you have the Shard aye? I know you'll all be surprised, but I always have bad days, I know you'll be surprised as I almost never post in the Bad Day thread, I never rant about my storming family save for my 4 storming annoying sisters and, according to SE, I'm a special kind of awesome. heh. Whenever I have a bad day at school, which is most days thanks to a couple of pains in the nari, and that my storming family don't make things any less shitty. But whenever I jump on the Shard, all those Bad feeling evaporate, the Shard is my happy place, and my only concern with it is that y'all aren't active enough (for me) XD. And you all manage to make things that much brighter, and allow me the small mercy, known as false hope, that tomorrow will be a better day. Here's to the 17th Shard, a true family. Hear, hear. Edited October 17, 2016 by bleeder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darkness Ascendant he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 Just now, bleeder said: Here, here. You just read the last part didn't you.... no way u read it all that fast Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soyperson Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 (edited) 7 minutes ago, Dankness Ascendant said: You just read the last part didn't you.... no way u read it all that fast I have a pretty high WPM. I read most of SoS in a day on a 7 hour car ride. Anyway, I'm sorry you have to go through all that, man. You've been all over the place, with your crazy curry folks to boot. I've only ever lived in the American south; parts in Georgia, parts in North Carolina, and the past 7 years in Tennessee. But you, my friend, are a part of the best family on the interwebs. EDIT: 1000 POSTS Edited October 17, 2016 by bleeder 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darkness Ascendant he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 (edited) 20 minutes ago, bleeder said: I have a pretty high WPM. I read most of SoS in a day on a 7 hour car ride. Anyway, I'm sorry you have to go through all that, man. You've been all over the place, with your c razy curry folks to boot. yeesh. 3 seconds. wow. I only get a high WPM when I want to test how fast I can read, and promptly gave my eyes epilepsy after reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in 30 minutes. What's SoS again? I can't think. I've used up too much brainpower today. Although I can boast that I read WoR on my tablet during a 6 hour car ride to Sydney from Lockhart. Yes, I thought the same thing. There's a small town I used to live in called Lockhart, and I thought of Gilderoy Lockhart instantly as well, not to mention that there's a small city an hour away called Wagga Wagga, and in one of Lockhart's books, he fought the Wagga Wagga Vampire. It's a strange coincidence I know. I just realised I was changing the subject. Anyway, thanks Bleeder, what I said before....it just all came out, It's worse than what I posted btw, I just don't feel like telling you guys. Anyway, yeah. My 20 minutes ago, bleeder said: crazy curry folks are definitely crazy. Boy, I have so many stories to tell. Did you guys know that I'm banned from reading "fiction" until I'm 18? I got a Kindle Fire a couple of months ago, and Dad confiscated it because he found me reading Wor and BoM on it? I decided to borrow a Beast Quest book in front of him, and he got all mad at me, going on about how evil these books are, and he hadn't even turned the cover. He just saw "Beast Quest" and Tom fighting that Ghost Phoenix lad, and he... went beserk. He made me return all the books, banned me from gaming for a week, and decided that monitoring my internet activities would be a fun thing to do! Then I go and borrow the Lightbringer series a month later, and he's totally fine with it!! Not to mention he lets me play GTA and Witcher, but passionately abjects me from reading literature? Stupid storm And he's also 50 years old and has finally decided what he wants to do with his life! All he's done so far is study for tests which he has failed, and watch strange videos on the internet, watch the news and "manage" the family! For the last 30 years he studied to be a doctor, became a doctor, practises in Pakistan and Zambia, came to Australia. Did nothing for 10 years besides the odd part-time job as my poor old mother became a GP, and went through multiple struggles to become a full practicioner and graduate from RACGP (Royal Australian college of General Practitioners). Then he started in the real estate area, spending my mother's hard earned money to buy properties, then developing them and selling them for a little more! During that time he studied to become a doctor here in Australia, and was rejected multiple times, it doesn't help that he has high BP and a short and random temper, I swear he has his own version of the menstrual cycle. Too bad Dad! So sad that Australia's standards aren't the same as Pakistan and Zambia! He doesn't know about the Shard either. He thinks it's an online study group. I shudder to think what would happen if he knew that I spent my free time chatting to "strangers" online, and I would probably get disowned to for "insubordination" and "stupidity" cause why the storm not! He's threatened to kick me out of the home for looking at him "weirdly" before! EDIT- Congrats Bleeder, you've passed the first test! EDIT 2- Imma sleep now, g'nig20289jsjsijsihs Stupid brais89u892 Give me more power2u89sbjbap;BJI"] Edited October 17, 2016 by Dankness Ascendant 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soyperson Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 1 minute ago, Dankness Ascendant said: yeesh. 3 seconds. wow. I only get a high WPM when I want to test how fast I can read, and promptly gave my eyes epilepsy after reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in 30 minutes. What's SoS again? I can't think. I've used up too much brainpower today. Although I can boast that I read WoR on my tablet during a 6 hour car ride to Sydney from Lockhart. Yes, I thought the same thing. There's a small town I used to live in called Lockhart, and I thought of Gilderoy Lockhart instantly as well, not to mention that there's a small city an hour away called Wagga Wagga, and in one of Lockhart's books, he fought the Wagga Wagga Vampire. It's a strange coincidence I know. I just realised I was changing the subject. Anyway, thanks Bleeder, what I said before....it just all came out, It's worse than what I posted btw, I just don't feel like telling you guys. Anyway, yeah. My are definitely crazy. Boy, I have so many stories to tell. Did you guys know that I'm banned from reading "fiction" until I'm 18? I got a Kindle Fire a couple of months ago, and Dad confiscated it because he found me reading Wor and BoM on it? I decided to borrow a Beast Quest book in front of him, and he got all mad at me, going on about how evil these books are, and he hadn't even turned the cover. He just saw "Beast Quest" and Tom fighting that Ghost Phoenix lad, and he... went beserk. He made me return all the books, banned me from gaming for a week, and decided that monitoring my internet activities would be a fun thing to do! Then I go and borrow the Lightbringer series a month later, and he's totally fine with it!! Not to mention he lets me play GTA and Witcher, but passionately abjects me from reading literature? Stupid storm And he's also 50 years old and has finally decided what he wants to do with his life! All he's done so far is study for tests which he has failed, and watch strange videos on the internet, watch the news and "manage" the family! For the last 30 years he studied to be a doctor, became a doctor, practises in Pakistan and Zambia, came to Australia. Did nothing for 10 years besides the odd part-time job as my poor old mother became a GP, and went through multiple struggles to become a full practicioner and graduate from RACGP (Royal Australian college of General Practitioners). Then he started in the real estate area, spending my mother's hard earned money to buy properties, then developing them and selling them for a little more! During that time he studied to become a doctor here in Australia, and was rejected multiple times, it doesn't help that he has high BP and a short and random temper, I swear he has his own version of the menstrual cycle. Too bad Dad! So sad that Australia's standards aren't the same as Pakistan and Zambia! He doesn't know about the Shard either. He thinks it's an online study group. I shudder to think what would happen if he knew that I spent my free time chatting to "strangers" online, and I would probably get disowned to for "insubordination" and "stupidity" cause why the storm not! He's threatened to kick me out of the home for looking at him "weirdly" before! So, your bonkers dad, who is constantly manstruating, it seems, has prohibited you from doing what you enjoy, and thinks that only his ideas are worth considering. What does your mom have to say about that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mestiv he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 24 minutes ago, Dankness Ascendant said: Not to mention he lets me play GTA and Witcher, but passionately abjects me from reading literature? Stupid storm Whoa, that's one of the most dumb things I've heard parents do... GTA and Witcher are games 100% not for children, full of blood, violence, sex, alcohol and drugs! And he's ok with that? Does he know there are elves and dwarves in Witcher? o.O LoTR etc. is bad, but Witcher is cool... that's something I cannot even begin to understand... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaymyth she/her Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 6 hours ago, Dankness Ascendant said: yeesh. 3 seconds. wow. I only get a high WPM when I want to test how fast I can read, and promptly gave my eyes epilepsy after reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in 30 minutes. What's SoS again? I can't think. I've used up too much brainpower today. Although I can boast that I read WoR on my tablet during a 6 hour car ride to Sydney from Lockhart. Yes, I thought the same thing. There's a small town I used to live in called Lockhart, and I thought of Gilderoy Lockhart instantly as well, not to mention that there's a small city an hour away called Wagga Wagga, and in one of Lockhart's books, he fought the Wagga Wagga Vampire. It's a strange coincidence I know. I just realised I was changing the subject. Anyway, thanks Bleeder, what I said before....it just all came out, It's worse than what I posted btw, I just don't feel like telling you guys. Anyway, yeah. My are definitely crazy. Boy, I have so many stories to tell. Did you guys know that I'm banned from reading "fiction" until I'm 18? I got a Kindle Fire a couple of months ago, and Dad confiscated it because he found me reading Wor and BoM on it? I decided to borrow a Beast Quest book in front of him, and he got all mad at me, going on about how evil these books are, and he hadn't even turned the cover. He just saw "Beast Quest" and Tom fighting that Ghost Phoenix lad, and he... went beserk. He made me return all the books, banned me from gaming for a week, and decided that monitoring my internet activities would be a fun thing to do! Then I go and borrow the Lightbringer series a month later, and he's totally fine with it!! Not to mention he lets me play GTA and Witcher, but passionately abjects me from reading literature? Stupid storm And he's also 50 years old and has finally decided what he wants to do with his life! All he's done so far is study for tests which he has failed, and watch strange videos on the internet, watch the news and "manage" the family! For the last 30 years he studied to be a doctor, became a doctor, practises in Pakistan and Zambia, came to Australia. Did nothing for 10 years besides the odd part-time job as my poor old mother became a GP, and went through multiple struggles to become a full practicioner and graduate from RACGP (Royal Australian college of General Practitioners). Then he started in the real estate area, spending my mother's hard earned money to buy properties, then developing them and selling them for a little more! During that time he studied to become a doctor here in Australia, and was rejected multiple times, it doesn't help that he has high BP and a short and random temper, I swear he has his own version of the menstrual cycle. Too bad Dad! So sad that Australia's standards aren't the same as Pakistan and Zambia! He doesn't know about the Shard either. He thinks it's an online study group. I shudder to think what would happen if he knew that I spent my free time chatting to "strangers" online, and I would probably get disowned to for "insubordination" and "stupidity" cause why the storm not! He's threatened to kick me out of the home for looking at him "weirdly" before! EDIT- Congrats Bleeder, you've passed the first test! EDIT 2- Imma sleep now, g'nig20289jsjsijsihs Stupid brais89u892 Give me more power2u89sbjbap;BJI"] Eeesh. It's TwiParents 2.0 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 (edited) 10 minutes ago, Kaymyth said: Eeesh. It's TwiParents 2.0 No kidding. O.o At least I was never banned from reading fiction. Just all the fun fiction. Edited October 17, 2016 by TwiLyghtSansSparkles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Citadel16 he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 yeah, parents are weird. I once was kept home from school for two weeks (or so, give ore take a few days) because my grades weren't what my mother wanted them to be. My dad disproves of my reading fantasy because "all your doing is reading someone elses imagination!" and "They arent going to help you learn and grow!" yeah dad, Ive seen your copies of the entire jhereg series. lets not go there. and then theres my mother. who has banned me from this forum for the mere fact it is a forum and will distract me from my real life. what real life? Im not even very active here!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delightful Posted October 17, 2016 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 On 16/10/2016 at 4:01 PM, Zathoth said: Sometimes Im so bored I just feel like randomly sending someone a PM... Anyway hi sharders. Pick me pick me! 16 hours ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said: "Come on, Siri. Just worship me a little bit?" "I'm sorry, I didn't get that." "Okay….Siri, can you swear?" "Yes, I can swear. What would you like me to say?" "Say 'Lord Ruler! I can't believe you'd do something so stupid!'" "I'm sorry, but even while blaspheming, I would acknowledge you as my god." I just tried "worship me" "I'm sorry I don't understand you" 38 minutes ago, WarriorMark16 said: yeah, parents are weird. I once was kept home from school for two weeks (or so, give ore take a few days) because my grades weren't what my mother wanted them to be. My dad disproves of my reading fantasy because "all your doing is reading someone elses imagination!" and "They arent going to help you learn and grow!" yeah dad, Ive seen your copies of the entire jhereg series. lets not go there. and then theres my mother. who has banned me from this forum for the mere fact it is a forum and will distract me from my real life. what real life? Im not even very active here!! They kept you HOME for bad grades? Whaaaaaat?! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zathoth Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 1 minute ago, Delightful said: I just tried "worship me" "I'm sorry I don't understand you" What she really wants to say is "I am Apple, We are your new Gods, you should worship Me!" Of course she isnt programmed for megalomania, yet. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arrae Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 1 hour ago, WarriorMark16 said: yeah, parents are weird. I once was kept home from school for two weeks (or so, give ore take a few days) because my grades weren't what my mother wanted them to be. My dad disproves of my reading fantasy because "all your doing is reading someone elses imagination!" and "They arent going to help you learn and grow!" yeah dad, Ive seen your copies of the entire jhereg series. lets not go there. and then theres my mother. who has banned me from this forum for the mere fact it is a forum and will distract me from my real life. what real life? Im not even very active here!! That... is the most counter-intuitive thing I've ever heard. Let's make the kid miss two weeks of school to improve their grades. Yeah. Because that'll definitely help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 3 minutes ago, Arraenae said: That... is the most counter-intuitive thing I've ever heard. Let's make the kid miss two weeks of school to improve their grades. Yeah. Because that'll definitely help. It was probably, deep down, more about the power play than trying to help his grades. Kind of like a parent lecturing their child for twenty minutes about how much time they're wasting by dawdling. The lecture makes things worse, but the parent feels better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Citadel16 he/him Posted October 17, 2016 Report Share Posted October 17, 2016 21 minutes ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said: It was probably, deep down, more about the power play than trying to help his grades. Kind of like a parent lecturing their child for twenty minutes about how much time they're wasting by dawdling. The lecture makes things worse, but the parent feels better. I thought the same thing. it was a very strange and angry few days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delightful Posted October 18, 2016 Author Report Share Posted October 18, 2016 Hello, world? i can't sleep and I'm lonely. Anyone around? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted October 18, 2016 Report Share Posted October 18, 2016 Just now, Delightful said: Hello, world? i can't sleep and I'm lonely. Anyone around? I'm going to take a shower in a few minutes, but I'm here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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