Adolin headcanon?

[The Honor Spren she/her]

I'm terrible at prefacing these sort of things with evidence and I'm not even sure this has been asked before, but I got a new headcanon that Adolin might be asexual. Thoughts?

[Calderis he/him]

9 minutes ago, The Honor Spren said:

I'm terrible at prefacing these sort of things with evidence and I'm not even sure this has been asked before, but I got a new headcanon that Adolin might be asexual. Thoughts?

Of all the characters for this, Adolin is not the one I'd have picked. 

He seems genuinely attracted, physically, to Shallan. 

[Nathrangking he/him]

The way that he seems to thrive on his ability to have as many girl friends as he had and as @Calderis points out he shows a true attraction towards Shallan. Does not point at someone who is asexual.

Edited August 7, 2017 by Nathrangking

[Erandeni he/him]

As others point out, he seems to be physically attracted to women, If I'd have to pick one asexual character would be maybe Jasnah or Renarin.

 

[Toaster Retribution he/him]

I strongly doubt this. He is at several occasions seen to be attracted to various women. 

[Steeldancer he/him]

I'm pretty sure that adolin might be the least asexual character in the Cosmere so far. Nobody else has gotten as many ladies as he has. Meanwhile, nobody else has had as many dump him as he has. 

[Toaster Retribution he/him]

2 minutes ago, Flash said:

I'm pretty sure that adolin might be the least asexual character in the Cosmere so far. 

I honestly think that title goes to Blushweaver, but Adolin isn't too far behind.

[Steeldancer he/him]

Just now, Toaster Retribution said:

I honestly think that title goes to Blushweaver, but Adolin isn't too far behind.

I think you're right about that lol. Forgot about her. 

[maxal she/her]

1 hour ago, The Honor Spren said:

I'm terrible at prefacing these sort of things with evidence and I'm not even sure this has been asked before, but I got a new headcanon that Adolin might be asexual. Thoughts?

I agree with others you might have picked the wrong character for your head-canon. Could you however detail your reasoning as to why you see it as a possibility?

[Andy92]

I can't answer for the OP but if I had to guess a reasoning, he only dates because he feels he has to due to his family title where marriages are important. It's possible he never stayed in a relationship long because he simply wasn't that attracted to anyone. Shallan is different for him because he likes her personality. 

I personally don't think he is asexual, but that'd be my devil's advocate take on it. 

[Nathrangking he/him]

Blushweaver gets an A+ for effort but We have seen the numbers and they scream Adolin the professional boyfriend.

[maxal she/her]

12 minutes ago, Andy92 said:

I can't answer for the OP but if I had to guess a reasoning, he only dates because he feels he has to due to his family title where marriages are important. It's possible he never stayed in a relationship long because he simply wasn't that attracted to anyone. Shallan is different for him because he likes her personality. 

I personally don't think he is asexual, but that'd be my devil's advocate take on it. 

Except we do know the reason he keep jumping from one girl to the next isn't because he is feigning interest, but because he feels unworthy. He doesn't think he is good enough for relationships, hence he unconsciously sabotages them. I would also point Adolin struggle with all his relationships, not just the romantic ones: he has the same problems with friends.

2 minutes ago, Nathrangking said:

Blushweaver gets an A+ for effort but We have seen the numbers and they scream Adolin the professional boyfriend.

Not really. Blushweaver had the means to back up her claims whereas Adolin has had 100 first dates. It is meaningless. What did he do during those dates? He strolled around camp, he listened to poetry, to hold hands but quite frankly he never went farther than this. His reputation as a "womanizer" is a complete scam which is highlighted by Adolin himself when he explains how little he knows about women and how clueless he really is, despite his supposed experience.

I doubt Blushweaver is clueless. Adolin is no professional. He's just an inexperienced kid more experienced people love to toy with in order to get a political advantage. He is merchandise, nothing more, nothing less.

[Crucible of Shards he/him]

1 hour ago, maxal said:

Except we do know the reason he keep jumping from one girl to the next isn't because he is feigning interest, but because he feels unworthy.

I think I missed this somewhere. Is this in the book, or did Brandon say this?

[maxal she/her]

4 minutes ago, Crucible of Shards said:

I think I missed this somewhere. Is this in the book, or did Brandon say this?

Brandon said it. He was asked why Adolin was so bad at relationships and he answered it was a combination of him being young, terribly bad at relationships and afraid he wouldn't be good enough. Because he is afraid, Brandon said there was a lot of unconscious sabotage going on.

The most common interpretation of the WoB is Adolin is actually afraid of taking a plunge with relationships, afraid others will not like him, afraid to commit and being rejected afterwards. Typically, social people who remain superficial with others tend to have this issue or a variation of this issue: fear of being judged, rejected or deemed unworthy. 

This being said, many readers have caught onto the behavior even without the WoB. It is mostly apparent with Adolin never knowing why his relationships are falling despite indications being he is the problem. He never seems to realize he is ruining them, which implies some level of unconsciousness. In his inner monologue, he does however yearn for a successful relationship which does indicate he doesn't do it on purpose: he wants resolution, but he can't get pass his fear of opening up to other people. In shorts, it is pretty obvious within the existing text, Adolin is not jumping from one girl to the next because he likes it, because he is a womanizer, because he prefers the thrill of the chase to the actual relationship. Worst, he is shy, inexperienced and he never takes the first steps: he gets courted more than him courting other ladies. We haven't seen him courting anyone within the first two books, but we have seen him being courted by four women (Janala, Malasha, Danlan and Shallan). He did not initiate the relationship in either case.

The WoB was just confirming what many readers have argument about which is Adolin is no Casanova, nor bee killer. He's just a rich boy from a powerful family who happens to be handsome: he constantly gets call on.

[Calderis he/him]

@Crucible of Shards @maxal

Here it is

http://www.theoryland.com/intvmain.php?i=1151#55

Quote

QUESTION

What is the thing with Adolin's serial dating? Is it just...?

BRANDON SANDERSON

He is bad with relationships, and that's just it. He's a little bit scared of being good at relationships, and so there's some kind of unconscious sabotaging going on. But yeah, he's young and he's bad at relationships.

QUESTION

Do the Radiants have only one gender per [order], or you can have...?

BRANDON SANDERSON

You have - yeah. There can be different genders.

QUESTION

Why is Dalinar very restrictive of Adolin but not with Renarin and Elhokar?

BRANDON SANDERSON

It is a little bit - I would say a slight flaw on Dalinar's part, he's too hard on Adolin. But that's because Adolin is in line for the throne, and he's the eldest son, and the heir, and all of that stuff. I would say that Dalinar's a little too lax in some ways, a little too strict in others.

 

[Nathrangking he/him]

Once again the WoB for the save and the win.

[maxal she/her]

Yeah, well, I find locating WoB to be increasingly difficult. I never seem to remember when and where I read them 

[Darkness he/him]

if that's the only WoB on the matter, I have to say I'm not convinced in the reasoning that he deems himself unworthy. People can be bad at relationships and unconsciously sabotage themselves for many reasons, not just feelings of inadequacy. Although, if he really goes all out to sabotage his relationship with Shallan now that she's a proven radiant, that goes a long way toward proof for me. He hasn't shown any signs of sabotage with Shallan, but it could be interesting if he does start backing off once he sees just how opposite of inadequate/unworthy she is.

I definitely want some insight into Adolin's motive, but please please please stick to WoB or textual examples for me. I tend to subconsciously rebel when subjective opinion and loose interpretation is presented as fact

Eager to see what comes out of this thread!

[maxal she/her]

5 hours ago, Darkness said:

if that's the only WoB on the matter, I have to say I'm not convinced in the reasoning that he deems himself unworthy. People can be bad at relationships and unconsciously sabotage themselves for many reasons, not just feelings of inadequacy. Although, if he really goes all out to sabotage his relationship with Shallan now that she's a proven radiant, that goes a long way toward proof for me. He hasn't shown any signs of sabotage with Shallan, but it could be interesting if he does start backing off once he sees just how opposite of inadequate/unworthy she is.

I definitely want some insight into Adolin's motive, but please please please stick to WoB or textual examples for me. I tend to subconsciously rebel when subjective opinion and loose interpretation is presented as fact

Eager to see what comes out of this thread!

The WoB says he is scared of being good at relationships: which is rather self-explanatory. His last thought towards his relationship with Shallan also went in the same direction: "She now was the most important woman in the world and what was he?". And yes, he has shown signs of sabotaging the relationship: he ogled the waitress during their first date, but something did happen to him then which never happened before: he fell in love. Hence, he wants it to work, more than any previous relationship, but didn't it even occur to anyone Adolin hasn't opened-up much about himself to her. People love to say how Shallan hasn't told the truth to Adolin, which is true, but he hasn't been himself either.

Also, Adolin never back-up of relationship because he feels the girl isn't worthy of him: he doesn't carry this kind of arrogance nor feeling of superiority. He will not sabotage his relationship with Shallan because he thinks she is inadequate, he will do it because he feels he is inadequate.

And well there aren't always WoB to support every single comment nor thought. WoB also aren't infallible as sometimes the transcription is wrong or the person understood it badly. 

In Adolin's case there are several in-text examples of him backing away from relationship and/or being afraid of committing to them. He does outright tell us while he loves talking to a lot of people, he didn't like being close to them. He is withholding. He's hardly ever genuine with other people. There is a severe clash in between his inner thoughts and his outside behavior. We get those things in the book which is why, even before the WoB, many would have said Adolin really isn't a playboy, he just really has issues with relationships. He is afraid: this is seen within many of his viewpoints.

What we do not know is why he is this way. I have had many hypothesis over the years. Typically, people who behaves this way experienced rejection at a young age which made grow up being self-conscious about their self-worth. Thus my latest one is Adolin's behavior comes from his parents doting more on his brother than him. It was part of his upbringing which was hard, filled with rules and obligations/expectations, but low in direct love which is something a kid like Adolin actually needed.

[StormblessDave]

@maxal I agree with most of your reasoning about why Adolin's relationships don't work out, however I disagree with the extremely helpless and pathetic picture you paint of him when it comes to women. He's definitely awkward, which is not a very rare thing, maybe he just didn't want to commit to anything as he is afraid he will mess things up or just isn't ready(uptill shallan), this fact is accentuated by the number of times this has happened mainly due to his position.

1 hour ago, maxal said:

What we do not know is why he is this way. I have had many hypothesis over the years. Typically, people who behaves this way experienced rejection at a young age which made grow up being self-conscious about their self-worth. Thus my latest one is Adolin's behavior comes from his parents doting more on his brother than him. It was part of his upbringing which was hard, filled with rules and obligations/expectations, but low in direct love which is something a kid like Adolin actually needed.

Lol,I sense some Renarin hate! I've always felt Adolin was the favourite son and the reason he grew so self conscious was because he was used to being the centre of attention, this is further proved by how Renarin is so used to being in the background.As to the low in love thing I don't think Dalinar was a very 'loving' father I have no clue about how their mother treated, so you might have something there.

[maxal she/her]

31 minutes ago, StormblessDave said:

@maxal I agree with most of your reasoning about why Adolin's relationships don't work out, however I disagree with the extremely helpless and pathetic picture you paint of him when it comes to women. He's definitely awkward, which is not a very rare thing, maybe he just didn't want to commit to anything as he is afraid he will mess things up or just isn't ready(uptill shallan), this fact is accentuated by the number of times this has happened mainly due to his position.

Lol,I sense some Renarin hate! I've always felt Adolin was the favourite son and the reason he grew so self conscious was because he was used to being the centre of attention, this is further proved by how Renarin is so used to being in the background.As to the low in love thing I don't think Dalinar was a very 'loving' father I have no clue about how their mother treated, so you might have something there.

Pathetic? Well, Adolin has been dating, dumping, misbehaving with countless of girls, whether or not we find the behavior pathetic, we have to agree it hardly is admirable. He isn't just awkward, he is double booking dates, looking at other women, ignoring his dates and he find a way to anger every single eligible young women in Alethkar. It is so extreme, it can hardly be explain by him "just not being ready", not when his inner monologue tells us "he is ready" and yet "it keeps not working". There is a severe disconnect into what Adolin sees and wants with what Adolin actually does. I also wouldn't say he is afraid of messing up things: I would say he is messing up things because he is afraid of what comes next, Shallan being one of the first lady he has allowed to get so close to him.

This isn't Renarin hate: my claim is actually supported by WoB. Young Adolin was jealous of Renarin as they grew up because he got a lot of attention which presumes he didn't, hence the sentient. People have generally decided Renarin was the shunned one, the disrespected one, the unloved one, but it actually has been the opposite. Trust me, I was surprised by it myself when I got it, but it comes from Brandon. Adolin was not the center of attention, sick Renarin was. It also makes sense with the existing narrative as the boldest of us have been arguing for a while Renarin was a bit spoiled by Dalinar, doted on (Dalinar admits how he feels for his youngest son, being forced to be second next to Adolin and wonders why Renarin wasn't taking it out on Adolin) and the recipient of his father's leniency which causes him to use passive/aggressive behavior to get what he wants. These are unpopular thoughts because most readers prefer to believe Renarin was bullied and rejected (there are no textual indications which supports it, but it is rather common thought). Truth is, when we look at the text, we see Dalinar being very loving towards Renarin and Elhokar, but not so much towards Adolin.

@Calderis posted a WoB which does confirm Dalinar is being too hard on Adolin and not enough on others: it does seem to be going on this way.

Either way, things we do know is yes, Adolin does have issues with relationships. Yes, it does seem to come from feeling of inadequacy. Yes, he was jealous of Renarin because he got more attention then he did when they were growing up.

Conclusions we can draw on these are numerous, but hey my take is as I said it. I could be wrong though, but we'll see.

[StormblessDave]

Wow that wob should be interesting, it could change my entire perspective of the Adolin, Renarin scenarios.

[maxal she/her]

16 minutes ago, StormblessDave said:

Wow that wob should be interesting, it could change my entire perspective of the Adolin, Renarin scenarios.

The WoB was given within a book signature. Brandon was asked to write something about the Adolin/Renarin relationship with the emphasis being on Adolin and this is what he gave: When very young, Adolin was jealous of the attention Renarin got. Those were Brandon's exact words.

Since grown-up Adolin has not shown the glimmer of jealousy towards anyone, especially not Renarin, we can assume the "attention Renarin got" was disproportionate. Really, it isn't hard to figure out it really happened. Sick children will often take-over most of their parents attention, disabled children will usually get most of it: I grew up with a problematic sibling and this is pretty much how it goes. Being a kid himself, these were things Adolin was probably unable to understand, especially considering autism isn't a known affliction on Alethkar which means young Renarin probably came up as "weirdly abnormal, but no so much people can really say he is disabled baring his blood sickness". It also isn't hard to figure out the kid having seizures and being constantly sick would be dote on more heavily on by his parents, this is only natural, though sometimes hard to bear for the "normal sibling". It is highly consistent with present day narrative where we absolutely do not catch any glimmer of dissatisfaction coming from Dalinar to Renarin. Also, at time, it is highly possible Renarin was just  young child and, not being much older, Adolin got the wrong impression, thinking if his parents aren't giving him as much attention, despite his successes, then it might be because there is something wrong with him. If with all he's accomplished he never, somehow, gotten the heartfelt praise he yearned for, then maybe it made him shy away from developing further relationships such as to avoid having to deal with the negative backslash once again. I mean stuff we go through as kids can have a lasting impact: I can clearly relate events from my early childhood having been defining moments for my grown-up self. It isn't hard to think Adolin might have had the same. Of course, I am speculating at this point, but based on the clues we have, it seems like a plausible explanation. It may not be entirely right, but some truth might be in it.

In shorts, you don't need to be broken, abused, tortured nor disabled to have had issues within your life and Adolin definitely has those with relationships. Here's another one:

 

Quote

 

BLIGHTSONG

Is Adolin's inability to form meaningful relationships important to his overall character arch?

BRANDON SANDERSON

Yes, it is.

 

 

 

So yeah, it is important for his character and it is definitely not something he does just for fun.

 

[Crucible of Shards he/him]

Thanks @maxal and @Calderis That was helpful. I didn't doubt it, but I guess I take things at face value pretty easily.