fun with google translate

[Peng the Just he/him]

So today I saw this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2bVAoVlFYf0&feature=player_embedded and decide to try running some of Brandon's work through google translate multiple times. for example if we take

Breeze strolled over to the table and chose a seat with his characteristic decorum. The portly man raised his dueling cane, pointing it at Ham. 'I see that my period of intellectual respite has come to an end.'

Ham smiled. 'I thought up a couple beastly questions while I was gone, and I've been saving them just for you, Breeze.'

'I'm dying of anticipation,' Breeze said. He turned his cane toward Lestibournes. 'Spook, drink.'

Spook rushed over and fetched Breeze a cup of wine.

'He's such a fine lad,' Breeze noted, accepting the drink. 'I barely even have to nudge him Allomantically. If only the rest of you ruffians were so accommodating.

and run it from english, to traditional chinese, to spanish, to italian and back to english we end up with this:

Breeze ride in the table, choose a spot with characteristic rituals. Big man raised his dueling cane, orientation ham. "I saw my period of intellectual truce came to an end."

Ham laughed. "I think a couple of darn problem, and I always hold me, just for you, the breeze."

"I really want to die," said Breeze. He left the staff to Lestibournes. 'Ghost, drink. "

Ghost racing, and remove the breeze of a glass of wine.

"He was a good guy," Breeze noted, accepting the drink. "I almost did not even push Allomantically. Hopefully the rest of your troll is so relaxed."

this amused me to no end, so I thought I'd share.

Note: I had to edit it very slightly to get rid of the profanity that Google translate added

Edited February 12, 2014 by jasonpenguin

[Baine he/him]

We should have a whole book translated into this! My vote would be for WoK.

[TheShogun he/him]

ORIGINAL:

“You’re right, of course,” Lightsong said. “I've just had a revelation. Mediocrity isn't the best way to serve our people.”
“What is, then?”
“Medium rare on a bed of sweet potato medallions,” he said, popping a grape in his mouth. “With a slight garnish of garlic and a light white wine sauce.”
“You’re incorrigible,” she said, finishing her stretch.
“I am what the universe made me to be, my dear.”
“You bow before the whims of the universe, then?”
“What else would I do?”
“Fight it,” Blushweaver said. She narrowed her eyes, absently reaching to take one of the grapes from Lightsong’s hand. “Fight with everything, force the universe to bow to you instead.”
“That’s a charming concept, Blushweaver. But I believe that universe and I are in slightly different weight categories.”
“I think you’re wrong.”
“Are you saying I’m fat?”
She regarded him with a flat glance. “I’m saying that you needn't be so humble, Lightsong. You’re a god.”
“A god who can’t even make it stop raining.”
“I want it to storm and tempest. Maybe this drizzle is the compromise between us.”

 

FINAL: (same language process as above)

"You're right , of course ," said Lightsong . "I just had a revelation. Mediocrity is not the way of our people. "

"What is this nonsense ? "

" A rare medal in the bed of sweet potato ," he said , suddenly appeared in their grapes in the mouth. "With the lowest setting and the light garlic white wine sauce . "

"You're incorrigible , " she said, her forehand .

" I just left the universe that I love you , my love. "

" You drive lean to the universe , then what? "

" What do I do ? "

"Fight ," said Blushweaver . She narrowed her eyes , one hand absently take part Lightsong grapes . "All the fights, instead of forcing the universe to bow to you. "

"It ' a fascinating concept , Blushweaver . , But I think that the universe and are slightly different weight classes. "

"I think you're wrong. "

"Are you saying I'm fat ? "

She dumped him . "I said, you need not be so modest , Lightsong . Thou art a god. "

"A God who can not make it stop raining. "

"I hope that the winds and heavy rains. Drizzle Perhaps this is a compromise between us. "

 

THOU ART A GOD

[GreyPilgrim he/him]

These are amazing.

A word of caution for all students of foreign languages: do not use google translate. Ever.

[Elbereth she/her]

Oh, yes. Individual words are sometimes okay if you're careful, but the grammar is absolutely horrendous.

[Aminar]

HE IS A BIG!  The Presbytarian Church.

(Sorry you reminded me of this http://winterson.com/2005/06/episode-iii-backstroke-of-west.html)

[Peng the Just he/him]

And if we take;

“She’s only seventeen years old,” Llarimar said. “I can’t imagine being
married to the God King at her age.”
“I can’t imagine you being married to the God King at any age, Scoot,”
Lightsong said. Then he pointedly cringed. “Actually, yes I can imagine it,
and the dress looks painfully inelegant on you. Make a note to have my
imagination flogged for its insolence in showing me that par tic u lar sight.”
“I’ll put it in line right behind your sense of decorum, Your Grace,”
Llarimar said dryly.
“Don’t be silly,” Lightsong said, taking a sip of wine. “I haven’t had one
of those in years.”

and run it through we get:

"She was only seventeen," said Llarimar. "I can not imagine
Married to the king of the gods in their age. "
"I can not imagine that you are married to the king of the gods, at any age, fast-moving"
Lightsong said. Then abruptly eyelid. "In fact, I can imagine that,
And the pain indecent dress looks on you. Please note that I am there
I think the nominal value of the imaginative eye twitching particular hit with his arrogance. "
"I put in the proper sense of the label behind the line, your grace."
Llarimar said coldly.
"Do not be silly," Lightsong said, taking a sip of wine. "I have not had a
Those years. "

[Delightful]

"Then abruptly eyelid"

"I think the nominal value of the imaginative eye twitching particular hit with his arrogance. "

[Cromptj he/him]

Even with a human translator, mistakes are inevitable if you translate things to another language and back without context. I heard an anecdote in which a group of people were celebrating Burns night in Germany, they translated the address to the Haggis into German "Great chieftain of the puddin' race..." And when it was translated back, it ended up being "Mighty fuhrer of the sausage people"

[Zenith]

Original Quote:

"My name is Gagaril," the man said.
"I'm sorry," Lightsong said."
The man flushed. "I was named after my father, Your Grace."
"After he what? Spent an unusual amount of time at the local tavern? Anyway, how are you involved in this mess?"

End product:

"My name is Gagaril," said the man.
"I'm sorry," Lightsong, "he said.
The man has been renovated. "My father, the name of your grace."
"After that, it was what? Spending an unusual amount of time at the local tavern? Anyway, what is involved in this mess?"

"The man has been renovated." I love it, lol.

 

Here's another

Original Quote:

He paused. You are shur? He wrote. Does that mean you beleve me?

"No," Siri said. "That was sarcasm, Susebron."

He frowned. I do not know this thing. Sarkazm.

"Sarcasm." she said, spelling it. "It's. . ." She trailed off. "It's when you say one thing, but you really mean the opposite."

 

End product:

He paused. It Shur? He wrote. This means that I beleve?
"No," said Siri. "It 's ironic, Susebron."
He frowned. I do not know anything about it. Sarkazm.
"Satire". He said, in letters. "This is ......" his voice. "When you say something is, but what it actually means the opposite."