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Tournament: Cosmere Character Roast Battles


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Yo, I'm Szeth-son-son-Vallano, the Assassin in White, Stonewalkin' in the east, where the men can't write.

Yo, Susebron you sitting up there as the God King, but killing your type, it's kinda my thing. Yes slayin kings is sort of my speciality, and I see through your supposed divinity.

Hey there Vivenna, we've never met, but I know all about ya, cause my sword taught me a bit. I know you took some Breaths, and I know something of heresy, but I killed lots of kings, so your's is lacking in severity. 

Vin, a street urchin without too many friends. You think you're pretty cool? Well better think again!  You got iconic outfits? I got that too, I could do anything better than you! You can burn all the metals, think being Mistborn is pretty cool? Well I trained with all ten surges, so where does that leave you? 

Yeah I'm Szeth-son-son-Vallano, ain't a Truthless no more,cause with this rap battle I'm gonna settle the score!

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6 minutes ago, AonEne said:

Congrats, Zath!

Ashspren, do we have to vote? What if we end up unable to decide?

You don’t have to! Everything is completely anonymous, and I totally get the feeling. I have a feeling that everything’s going to be really hard...

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41 minutes ago, Ashspren said:

You don’t have to! Everything is completely anonymous, and I totally get the feeling. I have a feeling that everything’s going to be really hard...

And these are just zur first two rounds. The expect the finals will be really, really hard.

Maybe you could add the winning roast to the op to "save" it.

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17 minutes ago, Sorana said:

And these are just zur first two rounds. The expect the finals will be really, really hard.

Maybe you could add the winning roast to the op to "save" it.

Great idea! Or a Google Doc, or something... kind of like a “Roast Battle Hall of Fame.” :D

Edited by Ashspren
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3 hours ago, Kramerfarve said:

*Looks bored*

You’re not worth the Breath.

 

Aww, I was kinda hoping you were going to go for a pre tongue-healing Susebron and your entire rap would just be stuff like “gom womf ah heem mowwah pumf...” ;)

edit: also, I second some sort of master spreadsheet or post or something with links to all the players/characters and their roasts, to make navigating easier. 

Edited by Herowannabe
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