Ranryu

Quick, someone remove one rep so it looks cool!

I got complimented on my tone in choir today :D
We were working on a crescendo and I kinda killed it  
My choir director looked at me and was like, "Oooh, nice tone, alto over there!" and pointed at me, and inside, I was like "YESSSS" 
(Yes he knows our names but sometimes he just doesn't care to use them bahahahahaha)

 

We had a test on moon phases in Science today, and we're working on polynomials in Algebra class. The school ACTUALLY had french fries today, which made me happy. I apparently missed a lot in History, but I'll just ask my teacher about it tomorrow :P 

 

My cats are adorable 

Got the biggest show choir comp of the season on Friday 

I'm going to a stake dance on Saturday after I get my hair cut (EEK! It's almost waist-length and I'm gonna go collarbone-shoulderish with like layers ig, though prolly not bangs cuz idk)

I've got an ankle appointment tomorrow!

Life's pretty decent right now!

Anyway, now that I've word vomited, I should go actually be productive and do homework or something. See y'all later! 

I got complimented on my tone in choir today :D
We were working on a crescendo and I kinda killed it  
My choir director looked at me and was like, "Oooh, nice tone, alto over there!" and pointed at me, and inside, I was like "YESSSS" 
(Yes he knows our names but sometimes he just doesn't care to use them bahahahahaha)

 

We had a test on moon phases in Science today, and we're working on polynomials in Algebra class. The school ACTUALLY had french fries today, which made me happy. I apparently missed a lot in History, but I'll just ask my teacher about it tomorrow :P 

 

My cats are adorable 

Got the biggest show choir comp of the season on Friday 

I'm going to a stake dance on Saturday after I get my hair cut (EEK! It's almost waist-length and I'm gonna go collarbone-shoulderish with like layers ig, though prolly not bangs cuz idk)

I've got an ankle appointment tomorrow!

Life's pretty decent right now!

Anyway, now that I've word vomited, I should go actually be productive and do homework or something. See y'all later! 

Okay, hi all! And happy Thanksgiving week! May there be pies with dragons on top upon all your tables. They’ll appreciate the tribute, I assure you.

That said, I figured now was a good time to catalogue some of my most recent slight weirdness. 

Kicking off… 

1) I petted a tiny table in Spanish class Thursday.

2) I drew a rat pancake on the blackboard in Spanish on Thursday.

3) I rejoiced over the dramaticness of a scene my friend and I roleplayed.

4) I recruited another friend to help me make a credible legend about my school (the fact that I need to bring in an outside source should serve as a testament to exactly how many crazy things I say there).

5) I decided to give my school friend a sword.

Just a little one.  

6), my crowning glory and the only thing in here really worth a status update:

How much is that dragon in the window?

The one with the firey breath?

How much is that dragon in the window?

I need him to burn you to deeeeaaaaath!

As a side note. I also received 21 tiny metal swords in the mail on Thursday that are GORGEOUS, and today my tiny stone jade-looking dragon arrived in the mail, which I christened Egypt. She is smol but she is wonderful. This needs a pic.

Now I have eight dragons!

I got complimented on my tone in choir today :D
We were working on a crescendo and I kinda killed it  
My choir director looked at me and was like, "Oooh, nice tone, alto over there!" and pointed at me, and inside, I was like "YESSSS" 
(Yes he knows our names but sometimes he just doesn't care to use them bahahahahaha)

 

We had a test on moon phases in Science today, and we're working on polynomials in Algebra class. The school ACTUALLY had french fries today, which made me happy. I apparently missed a lot in History, but I'll just ask my teacher about it tomorrow :P 

 

My cats are adorable 

Got the biggest show choir comp of the season on Friday 

I'm going to a stake dance on Saturday after I get my hair cut (EEK! It's almost waist-length and I'm gonna go collarbone-shoulderish with like layers ig, though prolly not bangs cuz idk)

I've got an ankle appointment tomorrow!

Life's pretty decent right now!

Anyway, now that I've word vomited, I should go actually be productive and do homework or something. See y'all later! 

I got complimented on my tone in choir today :D
We were working on a crescendo and I kinda killed it  
My choir director looked at me and was like, "Oooh, nice tone, alto over there!" and pointed at me, and inside, I was like "YESSSS" 
(Yes he knows our names but sometimes he just doesn't care to use them bahahahahaha)

 

We had a test on moon phases in Science today, and we're working on polynomials in Algebra class. The school ACTUALLY had french fries today, which made me happy. I apparently missed a lot in History, but I'll just ask my teacher about it tomorrow :P 

 

My cats are adorable 

Got the biggest show choir comp of the season on Friday 

I'm going to a stake dance on Saturday after I get my hair cut (EEK! It's almost waist-length and I'm gonna go collarbone-shoulderish with like layers ig, though prolly not bangs cuz idk)

I've got an ankle appointment tomorrow!

Life's pretty decent right now!

Anyway, now that I've word vomited, I should go actually be productive and do homework or something. See y'all later! 

I got complimented on my tone in choir today :D
We were working on a crescendo and I kinda killed it  
My choir director looked at me and was like, "Oooh, nice tone, alto over there!" and pointed at me, and inside, I was like "YESSSS" 
(Yes he knows our names but sometimes he just doesn't care to use them bahahahahaha)

 

We had a test on moon phases in Science today, and we're working on polynomials in Algebra class. The school ACTUALLY had french fries today, which made me happy. I apparently missed a lot in History, but I'll just ask my teacher about it tomorrow :P 

 

My cats are adorable 

Got the biggest show choir comp of the season on Friday 

I'm going to a stake dance on Saturday after I get my hair cut (EEK! It's almost waist-length and I'm gonna go collarbone-shoulderish with like layers ig, though prolly not bangs cuz idk)

I've got an ankle appointment tomorrow!

Life's pretty decent right now!

Anyway, now that I've word vomited, I should go actually be productive and do homework or something. See y'all later! 

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Hmmmm my left wrist smells like someone who is not me.

I don't know why. My left shoulder was punched three times, my right wrist was grabbed, and my legs were kicked, but that still doesn't explain why my left wrist smells like someone else. I do not recognize this smell. It's disturbing me.

Everything I aspire to be in life:

No seriously though go watch a video of these cute little rockhoppers. When they hop up the cliff, they fall, but they get back up and try again. Plus they have great eyebrows. 

Based on a meme I saw on Pinterest. @The Bookwyrm

Person 1: "Why are there ten loud saxophone players outside? This isn't even a metaphor they're actually out there."

Person 1: "I JUST PASSED THREE PEOPLE WITH TUBAS?????"

Person 2: "Please consider: marching band."

Person 1: "See here's the thing, that WOULD make sense, except I'm at the gym?????"

Person 3: "Marching band wants to work out. Upgrade to running band."

Person 1: "I'm dying just imagining someone violently playing the clarinet while sprinting after me."

@The Bookwyrm again, also @InfiniteInsanity and @ExoticAlmond

"Albuquerque" by Weird Al

Way back when I was just a little bitty boy living in a box under the stairs in the corner of the basement of the house half a block down the street from Jerry's Bait Shop (you know the place) - well, anyway, back then, life was going swell and everything was juuust PEACHY. Except, of course, for the undeniable fact that every single morning, my mother would make me a big ole bowl of sauerkraut for breakfast. Dawww - big bowl of sauerkraut! Every single morning! It was driving me crazy! I said to my mom, I said, "Hey, Mom! What's up with all the sauerkraut?"

And my dear sweet mother, she just looked at me like a cow looks at an oncoming train, and she leaned right down next to me, and she said, *gasp* "IT'S GOOD FOR YOU!!!!"

And then she tied me to a wall and stuck a funnel in my mouth and force fed me nothing but sauerkraut till I was 26 and a half years old. That's when I swore that someday, someday I would get out of that basement and travel to a magical, far away place where the sun is always shining and the air smells like warm root beer, and the towels are oh so fluffy! - where the shriners and the lepers play their ukuleles all day long and anyone on the street would gladly shave your back for a nickle!

Wacka wacka doo doo, yeah!

Well, let me tell you people, it wasn't long at all before my dream came true, because the very next day, a local radio station had this contest to see who could correctly guess the number of molecules in Leonard Nimoy's butt. I was off by three- but I still won the grand prize! That's right a first class, one way ticket-

To AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!

Oh yeah. You know, I'd never been on a real airplane before, and I gotta tell ya, it was really great... Except that I had to sit between two large Albanian women with excruciatingly severe body odor, and the little kid in back of me kept throwing up the whole time, and the flight attendants ran out of Dr. Pepper and salted peanuts, and the in-flight movie was Bio-Dome with Pauly shore

And, oh yeah, three of the airplane engines burned out and we went into a tailspin and crashed into a hillside
and the plane exploded in a giant fireball and everybody DIED! Except for me. You know why? 'Cause I had my tray table up and my seat back in the full upright position. Had my tray table up and my seat back in the full upright position. Had my tray table up and my seat back in the full upright position

Ah ha ha ha, ah ha ha, ah

So I crawled from the twisted, burnin' wreckage. I crawled on my hands and knees for three full days, draggin' along my big leather suitcase and my garment bag and my tenor saxophone and my twelve-pound bowling ball and my lucky, lucky autographed glow-in-the-dark snorkel, but finally I arrived at the world famous Albuquerque Holiday Inn, where the towels are oh so fluffy! And you can eat your soup right out of the ashtrays if you wanna.
It's OK, they're clean!

Well, I checked into my room and I turned down the A/C and I turned on the SpectraVision and I'm just about to eat that little chocolate mint on my pillow that I love so very, very much when suddenly, there's a knock on the door. Well now, who could that be? I say "Who is it?" No answer. "Who is it?" There's no answer! "WHO IS IT?!"
They're not sayin' anything. So, finally I go over and I open the door and just as I suspected, it's some big fat hermaphrodite with a Flock-Of-Seagulls haircut and only one nostril. Oh man, I hate it when I'm right. So anyway, he bursts into my room and he grabs my lucky snorkel, and I'm like "Hey, you can't have that! That snorkel's been just like a snorkel to me!" And he's like, "Tough." And I'm like, "Give it!" And he's like "Make me." And I'm like "...'Kay." So I grabbed his leg and he grabbed my esophagus and I bit off his ear and he chewed off my eyebrows and I took out his appendix and he gave me a colonic irrigation yes indeed, you better believe it! *gasp* And somehow in the middle of it all, the phone got knocked off the hook, and twenty seconds later, I heard a familiar voice. And you know what it said? I'll tell you what it said!

It said, "If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again. If you need help, hang up and then dial your oooooooo~perator!" "If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again. If you need help, hang up and then dial your oooooooo~perator!"

In AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!

Well, to cut a long story short, he got away with my snorkel. But I made a solemn vow right then and there that I would not rest, I would not sleep for an instant, until the one-nostrilled man was brought to justice. But first, I decided to buy some donuts. So I got in my car and I drove over to the donut shop and I walked on up to the guy behind the counter and he says "Yeah, what do ya want?"
I said "You got any glazed donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta glazed donuts"
I said "Well, you got any jelly donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta jelly donuts"
I said "You got any Bavarian cream-filled donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta Bavarian cream-filled donuts"
I said "You got any cinnamon rolls?"
He said "No, we're outta cinnamon rolls"
I said "You got any apple fritters?"
He said "No, we're outta apple fritters"
I said "You got any bear claws?"
He said "Wait a minute, I'll go check"

"No, we're outta bear claws"
I said "Well, in that case - in that case, what do you have?"
He says "All I got right now is this box of one dozen starving, crazed weasels"
I said "OK, I'll take that"

So he hands me the box and I open up the lid and the weasels jump out and they immediately latch onto my face and start bitin' me all over! (rabid gnawing sounds) Oh man, they were just going nuts! They were tearin' me apart! You know, I think it was just about that time that a little ditty started goin' through my head.I believe it went a little something like this . . .

"DAH! GET 'EM OFF ME! GET 'EM OFF ME! OH! NO, GET 'EM OFF! GET 'EM OFF! OH, OH GOSH, OH GOSH! GET 'EM OFF ME! OH, OH GOSH! AAAAAH! (more screaming)"

I ran out into the street with these flesh-eating weasels all over my face wavin' my arms all around and just runnin', runnin', runnin' like a constipated wiener dog. And as luck would have it, that's exactly when I ran into the girl of my dreams. Her name was Zelda. She was a calligraphy enthusiast with a slight overbite and hair the color of strained peaches.I'll never forget the first thing she said to me; she said "Hey, you've got weasels on your face."

That's when I knew it was true love! We were inseparable after that. Aw, we ate together, we bathed together, we even shared the same piece of mint-flavored dental floss! The world was our burrito. So we got married and we bought us a house and had two beautiful children - Nathaniel and Superfly! Oh, we were so very, very, very happy, aw yeah.

But then one fateful night, Zelda said to me, she said "Sweetie pumpkin? Do you wanna join the Columbia Record Club?"
I said "Woah, hold on now, baby, I'm just not ready for that kinda commitment!" So we broke up and I never saw her again but that's just the way things go

In AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!

Anyway, things really started lookin' up for me, because about a week later, I finally achieved my lifelong dream.
That's right, I got me a part-time job at The Sizzler! I even made employee of the month after I put that grease fire out with my face! Aw yeah, everybody was pretty jealous of me after that. I was gettin' a lot of attitude! OK, like one time, I was out in the parking lot tryin' to remove my excess earwax with a golf pencil when I see this guy Marty tryin' to carry a big ol' sofa up the stairs all by himself. So I, I say to him, I say "Hey, you want me to help you with that?"
And Marty, he just rolls his eyes and goes "No, I want you to cut off my arms and legs with a chainsaw"

So I did

And then he gets all indignant on me! He's like "Hey man, I was just being sarcastic!" Well, that's just great,
how was I supposed to know that?!I'm not a mind reader for cryin' out loud! Besides, now he's got a really cute nickname - Torso-Boy! So what's he complaining about?!?!

Say, that reminds me of another amusing anecdote. This guy comes up to me on the street and says he hasn't had a bite in three days. Well, I knew what he meant, but just to be funny, I took a big bite out of his jugular vein. And he's yellin' and screamin' and bleeding all over and I'm like "Hey, come on, don't you get it?" But he just keeps rolling around on the sidewalk, bleeding, and screaming (screaming sounds), you know, just completely missing the irony of the whole situation.Man, some people just can't take a joke, you know?

Anyway, um...  um... where was I?
... Kinda lost my train of thought

Uh... well, uh, OK
Anyway I, I know it's kinda been a roundabout way of saying it, but I guess the whole point I'm tryin' to make here is...

I!

HATE!

SAUERKRAUT!

That's all I'm really tryin' to say. And, by the way, if one day you happen to wake up and find yourself in an existential quandary full of loathing and self-doubt and wracked with the pain and isolation of your pitiful meaningless existence, at least you can take a small bit of comfort in knowing that somewhere out there in this crazy ol' mixed-up universe of ours...
There's still a little place

Called AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!
AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!
AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!
AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!
AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!

I said "A"! (A!) "L!" (L!) "B!" (B!) "U!" (U!) ......... "QUERQUE!!" (QUERQUE!!"
(epic guitar solo)

AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! 

AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! 

AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! 

AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE! AAAAAAALBUQUERQUE!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAALBUQUERQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Hey everyone!

I've been pretty inactive (and that's putting it nicely...) for the past couple months, but I really miss the Shard so I'm going to try to come back. I probably won't be able to be as active as I was before, but I hope to at least go on here more than I have recently!

Welcome back me, I guess

Now Bookwyrm won't let me read the articles about this one bacterial infection thing. And he took my phone and won't give it back.

Now Bookwyrm won't let me read the articles about this one bacterial infection thing. And he took my phone and won't give it back.

Now Bookwyrm won't let me read the articles about this one bacterial infection thing. And he took my phone and won't give it back.

Well guys, I finally did it. I colored the wood on all my colored pencils. 

 

(the image quality isn't great but it took me like four hours over the course of a week so I'm super proud of myself)