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Everything posted by Just-A-Stick
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I wrote a poem the other night
SpoilerCrippling Depression
I stare at the ceiling,Unmoving.My mindFeels numb.I don’t evenBlink my eyes.My body tingles,My hands shake,I’m cold all over.But the realChill isInside.I feel frozen in place,Stuck in aCold, mentalMud.My eyes water and aSingle tearRollsDown myCheek.I can’t even move toWipe it away.It feels warm,Then cold,Traveling down,To drip into myEar.I blink onceAnd it brings moreTears.They sting my eyesAs they fall.I am being consumedBy this empty feeling.By the immense lonelinessThat finds meSo often these days.I can’t get warm.I can hardlyMove my chestUp andDownTo breathe.The emptinessIs joined byThe massiveWeightOf self hatred.I can feel myHeartBreaking,Even as itBeats.My eyes goUnfocused,Lights blurry.The world is softerThat way,Everything looksLike clouds.Clouds thatI can sink into,Sink intoUnmoving,Wrapped in theCold mistyBlanket.I’m shaking harder now,I can hardly feel it.I can’t see it.I try toWiggle myFingers,But it’s too hard.I am faintly awareOf a sensationOf drifting.Have I joined theClouds?Is that what I am now?Cold and damp,Floating away,To some otherPlace?Twenty-three daysI whisper in my mind,It’s too long.I can’tWait thatLong.I’m drifting.D r i f t i n g…DRIFTING~ Stick 3-21-24